Office Tomboy

People are always commenting on my sense of style.  Mostly they say things like, "You know there's a hole, actually, lots of holes, in those jeans, right?" or "Is that a middle school Science Olympiad t-shirt?"

Okay, so I'm not a fashionista.  In fact, my interest in clothing ranges from little to none.  When I'm at home or just hanging out, this is fine.  I can wear my favorite torn-up jeans I've had since 7th grade and a zombie rights t-shirt and feel comfortable.

But seriously, have you ever been shopping for clothes?  It is completely boring and completely frustrating, both at the same time.  Everything is expensive, even at the "cheap" stores, and most of what's in-style looks stupid.  Also, everything is always too short or too low-cut, or is tight in some places and baggy in others.  I hate everything about it.

The problem is, I work in an office.  8 hours a day, 5 days a week, I have to pretend I'm an adult.  This means dressing nicely.

I think it's especially important for me to dress up since I'm somewhat in the minority.  I'm the youngest person in my building by a decade.  The next youngest person in my division has 15 years on me.  I also work with a dozen men as the only female in my division.  I don't need the wrong clothes to make me stand out any more than I do.

Here are some of my tips for looking respectful when you really don't have the interest or energy to put a lot of time into it.

Short hair.  All together, shower, breakfast, picking out clothes, etc. included, it takes me about an hour, from alarm clock to car, to get ready in the morning.  One of the things that really helps is that my hair is pretty short.  This means I don't have to fiddle with annoying things like a hair dryer.  (I do have one, but it's in storage, and I'm not entirely sure where.)  In the morning I just shower, get dressed, come downstairs, iron if necessary, and do my make-up.  Then I just run this goop (called "pomade") through my hair, and drive to work with my windows down.  The wind blows my hair all over this place and makes it look cool and spiky, like I styled it to look like that.

Make-up.  Things like foundation and concealer take time, so I don't use them.  I normally stick to eyeliner and eyeshadow, then some lipstick or lip balm in the car.  I take longer to brush my teeth than I do to put on make-up.

Clothing.  I like sundresses because they don't look funny on tall people.  Wherever they hit on the leg just looks like where it's supposed to hit.  I like dresses in general because you don't have to match tops and bottoms, it's just one piece.  As far as two-piece outfits go, I wear a lot of black because it's easy to match.  I also have a lot of white button-up blouses because they match just about everything and look professional.

Shoes.  I don't have anywhere near as many pairs of shoes as most women I know.  In fact, the other week, I managed to break both pairs of white dress shoes I own.  (They probably broke because I've had them since high school.)  I solved this problem by just wearing clothes that match my remaining shoes, which are black.  Unfortunately, I'm now wearing so much black that I look like June Carter went corporate.  Also, though they put me at 6', I wear high heels all the time.  This is due to the fact that my feet are size 10 and, if they're flat on the ground, they just stick out in front of me for about a mile.  High heels on me look less like clown shoes than flats do.

Accessories.  I wear my wedding ring all the time, of course.  I also have a matching set of earrings and necklace my husband bought me to go with it, but I usually only wear those on special occassions.  I do have a little silver heart pendant necklace from my mom that I wear every once in a while to dress things up.

So, to re-cap, here are my fashion tips:
1. Have a manageable hairstyle.
2. Make-up is mostly a waste of time.  Pick one feature (eyes, for me) and highlight it.
3. Jewelry's pretty much a waste of time, too.  Have one or two things you can wear once in a while.
4. Have at least one pair of black shoes and one pair of white shoes.
5. Wear dresses if you're not good at matching clothes.
6. Also, stock up on black clothes and white button-up blouses.  They match most things.

And, the most important tip to looking like you know what to wear...

7.  Work with a bunch of architects and engineers who probably wouldn't notice if you came to work barefoot.